A Rose By Any Other Name...
by KarmaLeafbarer
Summary: Ever since she was little, it has been RoseMadder's dream to compete in the Beauty Contest but she's never had the nerve until just recently...
1. A Dream Fulfilled...?

"Ohh...I just don't know..." Rose sighed, looking at her reflection in her hallway mirror. She had picked out her dress almost two years ago and it had hidden in the back of her closet as she had quietly worked up the nerve to participate in the beauty contest. It was made of blue satin and hung from her shoulders in thin straps, trailing down into a long gossamer skirt. "I'm too old." she complained with a sigh, turning her back to the mirror and looking over her shoulder in an attempt to see what it looked like from behind. "I can't compete with all those younger unis." she lamented.   
  
"Rose, are you going somewhere with this?" Dr. Death asked in exasperation from where he sat on the edge of the couch in the living room. "You told me you needed me to come over because you needed my help...and so far all you've done is make me sit here while you whine and stare at yourself in that mirror."  
  
"I'm sorry..." RoseMadder whimpered, her ears drooping. "I'm just nervous. I don't know what possessed me to fill out that application to be in the pageant in the first place this week."  
  
"Do you need my help or not?" the techo asked, his tail beginning to lash impatiently against the back of the couch. "Because I've got things to do at home and this is my only day off."  
  
"Well its MY only day off too." she argued, straightening her skirt a little. "You just want to check your mail and see if that horrid Zafara Girls calander you ordered came yet or not." Dr. Death flushed a bit in embarrassment.   
  
"No I don't." he muttered, crossing his arms over his chest. Actually, he did, but that was only one of the reasons he was interested in going home. For one, he had planned on watching the Deckball Finals to see if he had won the five hundred neopoint bet he had made with Hubert on the victor and for another, Rose's house made him uneasy. The air held a low aroma of potpourri and dried flowers that had begun to give him a headache and, lord, it was so PINK! He had never seen so much pink in one place in his life.   
  
Beside him on the couch, an angel chia plushie grinned stupidly up at him through its permanently-stitched smile and nearby had carelessly been tossed a valentines bruce plushie that she had gotten as a gift from the employment agency on her birthday. Feh...he needed to get out of here. Just sitting here made him feel like his teeth were rotting from all of the sweetness and light.   
  
"Fine, go then." Rose huffed. The doctor cocked a brow.   
  
"Are you sure?" he asked, not expecting her to have given up that easily.  
  
"Yes, go on." she said, making a dismissive motion at him with her hoof. "I should have known better than to ask you for help anyway."  
  
"Well for crying out loud, Rose, how often do you think I go out and buy frillies?? If you think the dress makes your rump look big, then it probably isn't the dress's fault! Don't ask me!" Dr. Death snapped in exasperation.  
  
"You're horrible!" Rose groaned, wrapping her arms protectively around herself. He snorted in annoyed contempt, getting up from the couch and leaving. She flinched as he punctuated his exit with a slam of the front door. What a grouch....even away from work he didn't lighten his attitude. She supposed it wasn't really his fault, given all he had to put up with from the hordes of abandoners they got daily, but she really wished he'd learn to control his temper.   
  
She gave a final look at her equine features in the mirror before sighing and slinking back into her bedroom to wriggle out of the dress and put it back on its hanger. What was she doing? Why did she ever think she stood a chance? Oh well....she supposed it would take learning the hard way to satisfy her curiousity. She sat on the edge of the bed after she had put the dress away, sighing and staring off into space.   
  
The contest was three days from now which left her with very little time to prepare and even less time to notify people that she would be participating. It dawned on her that, with no one to vote for her, she would be a laughingstock in the final ballots. She began to run through a mental checklist of people she could weasel a vote out of....there was Dr. Death, of course, if she could get him off of his tail and out to the ballots in time...and Hubert would likely help if she caught him before his lunchtime customers had all approached and begged him to vote for their pets. But who else? Nobody, as far as she could tell.   
  
Rose sighed and leaned back on the mattress, sprawling out and staring at the pastel pink ceiling. What a huge mistake.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The day of the contest drew near and all participating contestants had been phoned that morning to come in and fill out the necessary paperwork in addition to their participation form. RoseMadder stood patiently in line, feeling like an utter outcast as she cast a nervous look around at all of the uni foals surrounding her. She had been right, she was far too old to participate in things like this. The babies had their cuteness and innocense on their side...not to mention owners that likely had many friends who would gladly vote for them.  
  
"I can't believe I took two hours of my sick time for this..." she thought to herself, looking worriedly over her shoulder as an older faerie uni eagerly fluttered her opalescent wings as she chittered eagerly to her friend about how she had come in second in species last time but was hoping now for first place. In front of her, an achingly adorable pair of striped twins both quietly ate the lollipops their owner had given them. She suddenly felt very old and very plain.  
  
"Next?" the desk manager called out. The twins eagerly galloped forward and peeked over the edge of the table at the kindly-looking green usul behind it.  
  
"Well aren't you two precious??" he grinned at them. "Is your mommy around?"  
  
"Zat da gaming centew." one of them said around her lollipop....translated, "she's at the gaming center".   
  
"Alright, well, I'll need you two to fill these out as completely as you can and then probably bring her back later to enter in your legal information." Saying so, the usul pushed a small stack of papers and a pen across the counter at the twins who abruptly began to fight over them and who would get to sign what. The usul smiled indulgently at them as they gradually moved out of the way. "Next?" he asked, looking squarely at Rose. The red uni swallowed hard.   
  
"I...umm..." she faltered.  
  
"Come on up, I don't bite." the usul smiled at her, beckoning her closer. Feeling suddenly sick, Rose timidly approached the desk. "Well, its nice to see an older girl take enough pride in herself to enter our contest." the usul smiled. Rose felt her heart sink. Old....she was probably old enough to be most of the contestants' mother.  
  
"I think I'm going to have to forfeit." she told him quietly.   
  
"Nonsense!" the desk manager chuckled. "Its just jitters, my girl." She watched, fidgeting as he put together a packet of forms for her and handed her a pen from the cup of them on the desktop. "Just get these filled out and bring them back when you're done." Rose hesitated only a moment before grudgingly accepting the forms into her grasp and sidling out of the way so that the people behind her could get their necessary information as well.   
  
She selected a tree, not far off, to sit beneath and fill out her paperwork, but try as she might, every time she touched the pen to the paper, all of her insecurities would flare, preventing her from putting anything down. At length, she simply gave up, folding the forms and stealing quietly away from the gossiping throng of potential contestants. They were all so much prettier than she was. Painted, frilled up, youthful....and what was she? A dull red uni who had few charms and even fewer friends.   
  
Her mood, chipper that morning, dulled into a deep gloom as she retreated back to the adoption center. Dr. Death, immersed in paperwork for the incoming adoptees he had recieved in her absense, cast a disinterested look at her as she trudged in through the front door.   
  
"Get everything in order for your contest, Goldilocks?" he inquired with non-chalant sarcasm, setting aside a completed adoption profile and going to the next. Rose sniffled miserably in reply, quietly taking her seat beside him and opening one of the desk drawers, attempting to slip the beauty contest papers inside unnoticed. Unfortunately, her techo co-worker chose that moment to turn his head. "What's that?" he asked.  
  
"Nothing." she said defensively. "Just....just some papers. That's all."   
  
"You chickened out." he groaned, shaking his head. "I can't believe you left me here to deal with the hordes of abandon-happy morons by myself for two hours just to have you duck out at the last minute."   
  
"Well, you would have been intimidated too if you saw what I was up against!" she shot back, hurt in her voice.   
  
"That's why I don't bother with that dung." he told her. "I've got better things to waste money on than paint brushes and accessories."   
  
"Like this??" Rose growled, yanking open a desk drawer on his side and holding up a glossy photograph of Mianna Zephyr, a faerie zafara actress who had starred recently in the neopian blockbuster, "On Whispered Wings". Ms. Zephyr was posed on a beach and wearing an emerald-colored bathing suit.   
  
"Give me that!!" he snapped waspishly, grabbing the photo out of her hoof and stuffing it back into the drawer.  
  
"Hmph...serves you right for bringing it to work." she told him, sticking out her tongue at him. Getting into a spitting contest with the doc usually put her in better spirits, but it hadn't done much of anything for her mood today as she continued to sulk.  
  
"What's the worst that could happen?" Dr. Death asked her after he had closed the drawer. "You get up on the stage and prance around with all of the other little egotists and then the one who's weight best matches her IQ gets the trophy. Its not like they're going to single you out and laugh at you for losing."  
  
"You make it sound so appealing." the uni grumped, putting her head down on the desk with a defeated sigh. "There's nothing special about me anyway."  
  
"If you're hoping that this is where I'll give you a lecture about all of us being special in our own way, I'm afraid you're whinnying up the wrong tree." the doctor told her, blowing a strand of silver hair out of his eyes and wishing he hadn't left his comb back at the house on his nightstand.   
  
"Thanks a lot." Rose told him, pushing away from the desk and storming across the pound gloomily in the direction of the washroom. Dr. Death watched her go dispassionately, listening as the door clicked closed and shrugged. It really wasn't his concern whether she was happy or not. Nobody ever cared if *he* was in good spirits so he never really did other people the same courteousy. In fact, most of the time, it seemed like the people abandoning had done it simply to spite him. And then there were the rumors that had circulated about his mistreatment of the pets in the pound, saying he starved them or took away their toys.   
  
At first he had tried to defend himself against the false accusations, but had given up after a time and let people think what they wanted. Because of it, a lot of activists had harrassed him over the years about the "unethical" way he treated the incoming adoptees...and most had retreated back into the woodwork after being given a tour of the pound to be shown that, indeed, the pets were fed and watered and that many of them were still cuddling their plushies and petpets. It made him sick, really, the way some people jumped to conclusions.  
  
He waited another few minutes before leaning over and sliding open the drawer Rose had stuffed the papers into, retrieving them and looking them over. While they were long-winded, they didn't look terribly complicated. He cast a look over his shoulder at the closed bathroom door before getting up from his chair and retreating into the pound's back office a moment. When he returned, he carried with him xeroxed copies of the forms he had taken out of the desk and quietly replaced the originals back where he had found them.   
  
As he folded the copies, tucking them into the inner pocket of his labcoat, Rose emerged from the washroom, her face flushed and eyes red from crying. He watched as she returned to her seat, tearing open the drawer she had put the forms in and grabbing them out, crumpling them between her hooves and throwing the ruined papers into the wastebasket.  
  
"And I don't want to hear another word about this stupid contest." she told him sharply, clearing her throat and attempting to gain her composure back.   
  
"If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence you tried." Dr. Death told her. "Its evident SOMEONE lives by that policy."   
  
"Shut up." she grumbled. He obediently closed his mouth and didn't say anything else. "I've wanted to be in the contest since I was a little foal." she told him. "And when I took the job here I never had time to get all prettied up and enter....and now its too late." She felt her eyes tear up again and angrily brushed at them with her wrist.  
  
"Alright." he shrugged. "So leave the stage to the delicate faeries and rainbow mannequins who have owners that are willing to blow thousands of neopoints on a pretty face. You can't expect to compete with a bunch of pampered brats when you work for a living."  
  
"Its not fair." she sighed. "Why is the only ones who win are the ones that get gussied up in the most impressive outfits?"  
  
"Rose, its called the Beauty Contest for a reason. Its not called the 'Its Whats On The Inside That Counts' contest. Its MEANT to be petty. And I don't care how many movies you've seen, the judge is NOT going to declare you the winner if you tromp out on stage in plain clothes and inform everybody of all the good you've done for society."  
  
"I know that." she said icily. "And you can stop rubbing it in anytime now."   
  
"Just telling it like it is." he shrugged. "If you're not painted and you don't have a big guild to vote for you, you don't stand a snowball's chance in Tyrannia of placing. Its all a big popularity contest."   
  
"For never entering, you sure know about the contest." Rose told him.  
  
"I never enter, that's not to say I never GO." he retorted. Rose opened her mouth to argue it further with him when the door swung open and a timid-looking blonde girl trailed by two red kacheeks approached the desk.  
  
"Scuse me?" she asked sweetly. "But have you gotten any kacheeks in lately? These two want a little sister..." She gestured to her other two pets that peered over the top of the desk, looking nervously at Dr. Death out of the corner of their eyes. Rose fixed her expression immediately, forcing a smile.   
  
"I'm sure we have exactly what you're looking for." she told the small family, getting up out of her seat and escorting them to the back room where the kennels were kept. When he was sure that they were gone, Dr. Death pulled the copied forms out of his pocket and began to fill them out in Rose's name.   
  
"You did NOT leave me to run this place by myself for two hours just to weasel out of this, Rose..." he said quietly, irritated. It was not that he was offering her encouragement but moreso that he considered it a form of revenge. All of the poking and fun-making she had done to him in her time of employment....all of the non-chalantly trotting in a half-hour late to work...she was about to learn that paybacks weren't very much fun and DID come when you least suspected them.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The next morning, Rose awoke to the sound of birds twittering their dischordant melody in the trees outside and sunlight dappling her bedsheets. It occurred to her that this was the day of the contest and it made her pull the sheets over her head and cringe as she remembered that she had bowed out the night before. Maybe she would just stay there for the rest of the day...wait until it all went away. Or, she supposed she could be big about it and maybe stop by that evening to watch the judging to see who had won.   
  
Her thoughts were interrupted by the jangling ring of her telephone on her bedside table. For a moment, she simply stared at it, not wanting to pick it up as she was almost positive it would be Dr. Death on the other end complaining that he was swamped with adopters and abandoners and demanding that she come in if she wasn't going to participate in the contest and had taken a day off for nothing.  
  
Despite this, however, she found herself reaching for the phone, lifting the reciever off of its cradle on the tail of the fifth ring. "Hullo?" she asked sleepily.  
  
"Oh there you are! I was starting to think you were in the tub!" a cheery female voice chuckled on the other end. "Am I speaking to Ms. RoseMadder?"  
  
"Whatever it is you're selling, I don't want any." the uni said gloomily.  
  
"Waitwaitwait, don't hang up!" the voice implored. "I'm not a solicitor. This is just a courteousy call to remind you to be at the Bazaar Center at six tonight."  
  
"Tonight...? What for?" Rose asked, confused.  
  
"The contest, of course!" the woman on the other end of the line told her. "This is why we needed to enstate a calling tree. Some of our contestants, no offense, are more fluff than brain, and end up completely missing the contest if no one reminds them."  
  
"I know when the contest is." Rose replied defensively. "But I didn't enter."  
  
"No? But I'm looking at your application right here." Rose cringed a little at the faint rustle of papers on the other end of the phone.  
  
"Then there must be a mistake." she said decisively. "Because I promise I didn't send in any forms."   
  
"Nope, no mistake. Honestly, its funny how some neopets can fill out a five page consent form and then not remember it the next day." she chuckled. Rose felt, at that moment, she could have strangled the woman on the other line. "We'll see you at six, Rose." and saying so, the woman hung up. For a long moment, Rose simply stared at the phone as though it had come to life in her hand before hanging it up.   
  
She suddenly felt sick as her mind raced. She knew she didn't fill out the forms...in fact, she remembered throwing them away. And the only person who had seen her do it was---  
  
"Doc..." she said aloud, venom in her voice. For whatever reason he had dreamed up in that twisted lizard head of his, HE had done this. It was the only reasonable explanation. Without bothering to straighten her mane or give any thought whatsoever to her appearance (a rarity in itself among unis), Rose stormed out of her bedroom and out the front door. One of her neighbors, an elderly striped tonu, looked up from his gardening and had been about to wish her a good morning until he saw the look of absolute murder in her eyes as she stormed past.   
  
Having never seen RoseMadder in such a state before, he stood by quietly until she had passed before looking quizzically in the direction she had gone, wondering what could possibly have gotten her tail in such a horrible knot. Better to mind his own business, he supposed.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Dr. Death sifted through the mail, tossing the assorted junk flyers from people who were advertising their shops into the trash. Amid them he found the monthly electric bill and the pound's bank interest statement which he tossed onto the break room counter disinterestedly.   
  
"Boring..." he sighed, flipping through the rest of the envelopes in the crook of his arm. He paused momentarily to read a scribbled postcard that had been sent from one of the pound's "admirers" that had been written in red crayon and on the back held the lovely sentiment "RELESE ALL ANIMULS OR I KILL U!!!!" He pondered saving it for Rose to see so she could get a laugh out of it as well, but decided against it and threw it in the trash along with the junk mail. They recieved at least one letter like that a week from activists scattered throughout Neopia who didn't have the courage to come talk to them face-to-face and hid beyond anonymous threats.  
  
As he tossed away a coupon book, lamenting the fact his zafara calander still hadn't come, he heard footsteps behind him.  
  
"I'm on break." he said disinterestedly, thinking it was one of the pound customers who had grown impatient waiting for him up front and had come looking for him. "I'll be back up there in about five minutes."  
  
"You...." Recognizing the voice, he turned to see a rather disheveled and angry Rose standing in the doorway.  
  
"What're you doing here?" he asked, tossing the rest of the mail on the counter. "Thought you took the day off for the contest." She crossed the break room, stopping when she stood straight across from the yellow techo, glaring icily at him.  
  
"I didn't *enter* the contest." she said through gritted teeth, nearly touching noses with him. "Apparently someone entered FOR me." For a long moment neither said anything and dueled silently with their eyes....her blue ones piercingly accusing and his yellow ones mellow and narrowed.  
  
"Maybe someone did. Maybe that someone got sick of watching you flapping around like a headless peadackle and wanted you to get on with it." he replied quietly.  
  
"How dare you!" she cried, seizing the lapels of his labcoat and yanking him forward. "Do you have any idea how embarrassed I am now? If I show up, I get to make a fool of myself on the stage in front of half of Neopia, and if I DON'T show up, everyone will have to listen to them calling my name over the loudspeaker all night looking for me and I'll have to live down their teasing that I wussed out tomorrow!!"  
  
"So?" he asked, still uncommonly calm. Before she could stop herself, she shoved him. The doctor hadn't been expecting it, stumbling backwards and colliding hard with the refridgerator against the wall with an audible "Whuff!" as the air left his lungs.  
  
"SO??" she shrieked. "I'm going to be a laughingstock!!"  
  
"Oh please, Rose, you honestly think people don't have better things to talk about besides you?" he asked in irritation, wincing as he rubbed at a forming bruise on his lower back where he had collided with the fridge doorhandle. "You're worse than those attention hogs that are going to be on the stage tonight if you think people's worlds are going to center around whether or not you participate!"  
  
"No I'm not!" she complained, her lip beginning to quiver. "I just....." she sniffled, trembling a little as the first of her tears began to spill down her cheeks. "I don't...wanna....be laughed aaaaatttt...." she broke down, sobbing loudly. The techo watched his coworker cry dispassionately for a moment before rolling his eyes and sighing, approaching her.   
  
"So what if they laugh?" he asked. "Think about who you're trying to impress. A crowd of squealing kids and their owners."   
  
"I'm not going to go." she whimpered, her ears flattened in humiliation at both her outburst and the fact that she was expected to make an appearance tonight. "If I just lay low, this will all blow over someday..." she choked back a sniffle as she said this. Dr. Death was silent for a long moment, and then, in a rare show of affection, placed a hand on her shoulder.   
  
"Rose, honestly, what's the worst you think is going to happen?" he asked her. "You said you've been wanting to do this all your life and if you wait much longer, you're going to end up working up the nerve to try again when you're somebody's grandma and then people are REALLY going to laugh at you."  
  
"S-So you submitted the forms to help me live out my dream?" she asked, looking up at him in astonishment.  
  
"No, I did it to get back at you for making me run this dump by myself just to have you come running back here with your tail tucked between your legs and whining that the whole world's against you." he said matter-of-factly. "AND that you made me spend an hour of my day off sitting on your couch watching you preen your hair." She scowled, turning roughly away from him.  
  
"I can't believe you'd put me in this kind of situation." she whimpered. "I've worked with you for almost five years and this is how much you respect me??"  
  
"Hey hey, woah..." Dr. Death interrupted her tirade. "You wanna pull the respect card, kiddo? Let's talk about the time you dumped habanero sauce in my coffee....or how about when you got it into your brain to xerox the daily reports on flash paper and "accidentally" let a scorchio sneeze on them? Or then there was the time---"  
  
"You made your point." the uni grumped and then sighed, turning and walking out of the break room.  
  
"Where are you going?" he asked her.  
  
"Home." she replied flatly. "I'm going to make myself some cocoa, take a long bubble bath, and forget today ever happened."  
  
"Whatever floats your boat." he shrugged. "Being laughed at isn't the end of the world, for the record. With a name and reputation like I have, I get laughed at every blasted day and you don't see me sulking and wailing."  
  
"Whatever, doc...." she sighed, hanging her head as she left. For a brief moment, he wondered if he should follow after her. No...he was going to let her sweat this one out on her own and if she wanted to shrivel up and die because a couple people might talk about her behind her back, that was her problem.   
  
"Hey! Can I get some help up here??" an obnoxious voice yelled from up front. Dr. Death sighed.  
  
"Coming!" he called back, gathering up his scattered wits and taking a deep cleansing breath before venturing up front to deal with the customer.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
She still didn't know what had possessed her....or why she hadn't stuck to her guns about staying home. At first, she had done precisely what she had told Dr. Death she was going to do....she had indulged herself in a large mug of cocoa with raspberry marshmallows melted in it and then had taken a long relaxing bubble bath. Afterward, however, instead of returning to her room to sulk the evening away, she had found herself spending nearly an hour in front of the mirror, meticulously brushing and styling her mane and tail. Afterward, she had rouged her cheeks and applied a bit of lip gloss....and now, here she was.   
  
Rose looked herself over in the mirror as she had a few days ago, still just as uncertain. She wore her dress again, this time with an opal necklace and a pair of small golden earrings in the shape of moons that winked faintly. Her mane hung in shining curls over her shoulders and down her back and her tail had been brushed perfectly straight and tied with a bow that was the same color as her dress.  
  
She had given no one any warning, she had no one that would vote for her, and felt she stood no chance against her competition, yet for whatever reason, she had decided she was going to the contest tonight.   
  
"Its not too late, you know. You can still back out of this." a voice said somewhere in her head. She told that voice to kindly shut up as she checked herself one more time and then hesitantly turned away, crossing her living room to her front door. She lingered for a moment with her hoof on the knob before forcing herself to step outside and close the front door behind her. The sun was at its highest point in the sky, not quite ready to set, and her neighborhood street, mercifully, was mostly deserted since everyone was either having dinner or already at the contest to watch the judging.  
  
Holding her head up and determined she was going to go through with things, RoseMadder walked briskly down the street and in the direction of the Neopian Bazaar. As she drew nearer to her destination, she found herself surrounded by hundreds of other neopets, all of them prettied up just as she had been.   
  
"Stop struggling, Kiyomi!" a black-haired human girl complained nearby as she busily ran a rainbow paint brush over her faerie nimmo's wings, trying to get the color to stick instead of running off and puddling in the grass. "If this works, you'll be the most beautiful nimmo there!" Rose vaguely wished she had an owner to help HER prepare. Or even a paint brush to make herself look more unique as she passed through the throngs of costumed and painted pets that loitered outside of the Center, all of them making last minute preparations for the contest.   
  
Rose passed them all by, feeling dizzy from all of the activity as she made her way up the center's walk and went inside. The spectators were all gathered in the auditorium and the low rumble of their thousands of voices made her feel nervous as she hurriedly walked through the back hallway and in the direction of the backstage dressing rooms. Quickly, she pulled the dressing room door open an slipped inside, sighing with relief as she closed it again behind her.  
  
"Hey gramma, you in the contest?" a snide voice inquired. Rose looked over her shoulder at a younger uni, painted a dazzling gold color who was glaring at her as though she was the ugliest spider she had ever seen.  
  
"I'm in the contest, yes." Rose said, embarrassed by how small her own voice sounded. The gold uni tossed her mane and chuckled.  
  
"That's cute, grams, real cute."  
  
"My name is Rose." she said defensively.  
  
"Whatever. Actually I hope all of the competition's like you. It'll make winning a lot easier." she smirked. RoseMadder, though she didn't make a habit out of hating people, found herself strongly disliking this brat more and more by the minute. She opened her mouth to retort when the door blasted open behind her and a rather unkept uni, a pair of lopsided sunglasses on his muzzle, trotted into the room.   
  
"I'M KEWL!!!!" he cried at the two fillies. The golden uni rolled her eyes.   
  
"You're entering AGAIN, you loser?" she sighed. "Why don't you go help your owner root through the dumpster for omelettes or something?"  
  
"I'M KEWL!!!" he announced again, grinning and seeming proud of himself. Rose supposed his intelligence was rather low...probably because his owner couldn't afford to buy him books. Poor guy...   
  
"Moron." the gold uni scoffed, trotting daintily to the corner of the dressing room where she had set her duffle bag. Rose drew in a slight gasp as she watched the spoilt equine withdraw several ungodly expensive plushies from her bag and begin to idly play with them. Her owner must have been incredibly wealthy. Another wave of uncertainty washed over Rose and she was uncomfortably aware of her unpainted fur and her age.   
  
The door banged open again as more unis began to filter inside.   
  
"Hey, you work at the pound, don't you?" a slender faerie-painted uni inquired, grinning at Rose as she passed her.  
  
"I....uh huh...." she nodded.   
  
"Wow....I bet you've got all sorts of inner connections for votes then, huh?" the faerie asked, looking a little dejected.  
  
"No...not really. I don't think anyone even knows I'm competing tonight." The stranger studied Rose's face a moment to see if she was kidding before breaking into a smile.   
  
"Name's FluffyRabbit." she informed her, smiling.  
  
"Rabbit?" Rose asked, quirking a brow.  
  
"I used to be a cybunny." the faerie uni shrugged. "My owner and I decided to give the lab ray a try and...heh...this is what we ended up deciding on."  
  
"You look very nice." Rose told her.  
  
"Oh bah...I'm just a face in the crowd. There's all sorts of faerie unis that compete every week and never get anywhere." FluffyRabbit informed her. "Scuse me, hon, but I need to go get ready." And, in a shimmer of gossamer wings, the faerie uni had crossed the room to examine her reflection in a vanity mirror. In the corner, the golden uni that Rose had butted heads with earlier, continued to survey the crowd distastefully as she cuddled her Snowager plushie and Rose favored her with a dirty look. Though she was sure that nobody would vote for herself, she certainly hoped that no one would vote for such a disrespectful girl either.  
  
  
TBC.... 


	2. Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad

"Honestly, Doc, you should try sticking to your own species." Hubert sighed.  
  
"Huh?" the frost-haired yellow techo asked distantly, his eyes never leaving the stage, a look of utter infatuation in them. Though he didn't have anyone he would call a friend, Hubert and he had taken to watching the judging of the contest together since they both attended every week. The blue mynci slapped his forehead.  
  
"Nevermind. I shouldn't even waste my breath talking to you when the zafaras are being judged." he grumbled. "What do you see in them anyway? I mean, floppy ears? Spiny backs? Big legs? Give me a nice pretty mynci gal with a big curly tail any day over one of those freaks. You don't even stay around for the techo girls so how do you know you don't like'em??"   
  
"Shush." the doctor muttered, though he hadn't heard a word Hubert had just said. The hot dog vendor glared at him for a long moment and then sighed again, turning his eyes back up front as a starry zafara female in a cheery yellow summer dress sang her own rendition of one of M*Ynci's most recent hits, "Jungle Of Love". She, a faerie female, and a purple male were the finalists of their species and were all competing for first place. After them would be the skeiths and then the flotsams and then the unis.   
  
"How long you stickin' around tonight, man?" Hubert asked as the girl onstage finished her song and the applause began.  
  
"Oh....I don't know." Dr. Death shrugged. "I'll probably stay for the unis and then head home and get to bed."  
  
"Why the unis?" the mynci asked.   
  
"I want to tell Rose whether she would have had a chance of winning or not if she had had enough guts to show up tonight." he replied simply.  
  
"Man, was Rose gonna enter??" Hubert asked, perking his humanesque ears a bit.  
  
"She was....she decided to hide her head in the sand instead." the doctor shrugged.  
  
"Aww that's too bad. I bet a lot of people would have voted." he sighed. "I mean, think about how many pets she's helped stick with an owner."  
  
"I tried to get her to show up by entering her anyway after she bowed out, but she says she's still not going. And its not my problem." the techo told him as the judge stepped onstage to announce that the faerie zafara was the winner and she bounded forward to accept her trophy and give the audience a tearful and blubbering speech amid the applause and flying rowse blossoms.  
  
"Still a shame." the mynci told him. The stage was cleared and the participating skeiths began to file onstage.   
  
"Yech..." Dr. Death grunted, looking distastefully at the pig/dragon neopets as they began to parade across the stage. Hubert elbowed him sharply in the ribs.  
  
"Be nice." he warned.  
  
"I can't watch this." the techo groaned as a rather obese red female skeith, somehow crammed into a dress that was far too small for her, waddled across the stage and grinned toothily at the audience. "I'm going outside."  
  
"Concession stand closed about a half hour ago...they don't sell during the show." Hubert warned.  
  
"I don't really care." he replied.  
  
"Shhh!!" an elephante hissed at them from a row behind them. "I'm trying to watch the show!" Dr. Death and Hubert exchanged a vehement glance with the elephant neopet before both of them got up and sidled out of the isle, quietly exiting into the outside hallway. The doctor breathed a long sigh of relief as he reflexively reached for his coat pocket that he usually kept his package of cigarettes, only to remember he wasn't wearing his labcoat tonight.  
  
"If you're not going to sit through the entire show, why do you even come?" Hubert inquired, leaning up against the wall beside the auditorium door.  
  
"When you go to a concert in Tyrannia, do you sit around all week waiting for ALL the bands to play or just the one you came to see?" Dr. Death asked with a shrug, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his black slacks. "I go to the contest to see the zaffies, is that a crime?"  
  
"Nah...chill, man." Hubert told him. "Wasn't trying to get you all ruffled. So you wanna head in after the skeiths are over or wait till its time for the unis?"  
  
"Dunno, I was thinking maybe I might---" he trailed off, hearing someone approach.  
  
"...and can you believe the idiots I'm up against this time? From what I've seen, at least half of them aren't even painted and even more of'em probably don't even know what a book IS from the way they talk." A female voice scoffed  
  
"Oh I know...they should have some quality standard you should have to pass before you get in the show or something..." As the techo and mynci watched, a dazzlingly gold uni and a white usul strode into view, coming from the direction of the ladies room. The usul busily ran a brush through her hair, her eyes fixated on her reflection in a small circular compact mirror as the uni checked herself over to ensure she was immaculate. "Its not really a contest anyway....ever since you joined that guild, you've had all sorts of friends to vote for you."  
  
"I know, and its nice that they can actually recognize someone who deserves to win instead of half these trolls. Its like mum says...you can put blueberry jam on an animal cracker, put it on a golden tray and call it a french tart, but its STILL just a sticky animal cracker."   
  
"I like that!" the usul giggled. "I should remember that one!" She looked briefly up from her compact to scowl at Dr. Death and Hubert as they passed. "Hmph....losers." she remarked snidely.   
  
"I hear ya." the uni agreed. "So anyway, this week I thought if I win the gold for species again, I'd get the trophy melted down so mum's boyfriend could make us matching charm necklaces."  
  
"Will they let you do that?" the usul inquired.  
  
"Don't care. I've already got plenty of'em already and I'm running out of room so I thought--" at that point, they had passed out of earshot and their voices became intelligable against the echoes they created.  
  
"What a couple of snobs..." Hubert remarked, shaking his head. "You notice Neopia's bringin' in more of them each day?"  
  
"I haven't been paying attention, but what do you expect at this sort of thing? All these social rejects crawl out of their caves and come here to show off." Dr. Death sighed in exasperation. "Did you hear her, though?"  
  
"When she said we were losers? Loud and clear, brother."  
  
"No..." the techo grumbled. "What she said about the votes. Like this is all a matter of who has the most connections."  
  
"Yeah...and what's sad is the judges can't really do anything about it because its not cheating asking people to vote for'em." the monkey shrugged.  
  
"Well, I'm glad Rose didn't show up tonight then." the doctor sighed.  
  
"That's sweet, doc, that you'd be worried about her feelings like that." Hubert smiled.  
  
"HER feelings? Feh...I'd have to listen to her whine and cry all week about it if she lost." he replied sharply, stuffing his hands into his pockets. "Guess she had better foresight about this than I did. At least she's home instead of--"  
  
"Rose, hon, c'mon out of there...we've got to head backstage now!" a musical voice floated down the hallway, making both the techo and the mynci whip their heads in its direction.   
  
"Just a minute..." a muffled and painfully familiar voice replied. "This stupid lipstick just refuses to look right..."   
  
"You look fine, now hurry!" the other voice laughed. A door opened and bumped shut again and Dr. Death felt his mouth drop a little as Rose emerged from the same hallway the golden uni and white usul had come from earlier, walking side-by-side with a younger faerie uni. They bustled past without noticing him or Hubert and disappeared down the same hallway the two obnoxious girls had moments ago.   
  
"She.....she...." Dr. Death faltered after a moment.  
  
"You told me she wasn't entered..." Hubert said, blinking.  
  
"That's what she told me!!" the techo shot back. "She's....oh great..." he sighed, slapping his forehead loudly. "I knew someone up there hated me..."  
  
"So now what?" Hubert inquired. "You know she's gonna lose to The Golden Goose, there..."  
  
"I know it." the doctor shrugged. "What am I supposed to do about it?  
  
"I dunno." the hot dog vender replied. "Wanna see if we can scrounge up some voters for her?"  
  
"Its a little late to start a campaign." the techo told him. "Especially if the ballot's already fixed. As soon as that brat sets hoof on that stage, she's as good as won. The others don't stand a chance."  
  
"Yup." the mynci remarked. There was a moment's pause and then, as though the idea had settled into their brains at the same time, Dr. Death and Hubert both exchanged a quick glance and lit off in the direction the girls had gone..  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Calling all flotsams to the stage." a monotonous voice declared over a small speaker in the waiting room. The fish neopets all chattered excitedly to one another, making last minute preparations before filing hurriedly out of the room to compete.   
  
"Good luck!!" FluffyRabbit called after a striped flotsam she had been chatting with.   
  
"Thanks, Fluff!" the flotsam grinned, giving a hurried wave before scuttling out of the room. The faerie uni turned to where Rose sat beside her, staring off into space and her legs nervously bouncing beneath the skirt of her dress. She reached out, touching the red uni's shoulder gently and making her jump a little as she came back to her senses.  
  
"You'll do fine, Rose." she assured her. "What are you so nervous about, anyway?"  
  
"Oh...just don't think I'm cut out for the stage..." she smiled weakly. "That and I think a few people I know are going to see me."  
  
"Well that's good, isn't it? I mean...they'd vote for you then."  
  
"Actually, I think it would be more like a few of them to laugh at me..." her mind turned to Dr. Death as she thought of this. Had he come tonight or was he just pulling her tail about attending the contest now and then? Her head began to pound with an oncoming headache as the room suddenly seemed too stifling. The smell of hairspray and perfume was thick and everyone was packed so tightly together that the heat they created made her feel dizzy.  
  
It occurred to her with dawning horror that she hadn't had time to prepare any special act for the show...what was she going to do when her turn came to do a solo act? She doubted that the karaoke machine the contest staff had supplied would have any songs on it that she knew nor did she think she'd be able to wing a decent performance even if they did. A speech! She could give a speech! But about what? She was bad enough at public speaking without trying to make it up as she went.  
  
"Well, if it makes you feel any better, I'm pretty sure I'm going to blow my act..." FluffyRabbit offered.  
  
"Oh? What're you doing?" Rose asked.  
  
"A tapdance routine." Fluff blushed. "Been working on it all week. I keep tripping and falling at this one part. It would've been easier to just leave that part out of the routine, but I'm kind of a perfectionist." she admitted. "What about you? What're you going to do?"  
  
"I'm...ahh...." she faltered. "You know, I don't know what I'm doing..." she whimpered. "I didn't remember we had to prepare an act...." The faerie uni's eyes flew wide.  
  
"Oh no! What are you going to do??" Rose shook her head and shrugged. Before Fluff could offer any suggestions, however, the door to the waiting area burst open and a starry uni pranced in, clapping her front hooves together loudly.   
  
"Okay people!! We're up next, let's show a little organization!" she declared loudly, commanding the attention of all the uni contestants. "Let's have all the males in one line, all the females in another. Hurry now! Quick quick!" Rose and Fluffy exchanged a worried look, but both rose from their seats to get in line with the other girls. For a moment, Rose debated slipping to the back so she would be among one of the last girls to go on...maybe it would give her a chance to think up something for her solo routine. In the end, however, she stayed where she was. If she was going to be humiliated, better to do it with style, she supposed.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"If I don't find my nail polish, things are going to be unpleasant around here!!" DarlingAngelFae snapped to the empty dressing room. Everyone else had left, leaving the golden uni to rummage for her missing fashion accessory by herself. She gave an irritated snort, swishing her tail angrily. Someone was in big trouble, she decided, as she tossed aside a large pile of discarded jackets and backpacks belonging to other contestants. Still no polish. The golden uni was all but sizzling as she stood rigidly amid the scatter of coats. It wasn't that she needed the polish...she knew she was going to win....but looking anything less than perfect REALLY irked her.  
  
Well, that left one place to look. DarlingAngelFae turned her gaze to the small closet in the corner of the room that had, early on, been filled with the belongings of the contestants who had arrived early. She didn't hold out much hope, but decided it was better than being left wondering as she crossed the room and ducked inside. Much to her surprise, her missing purple nail varnish was laying in the middle of the floor as though it had simply been waiting for her to find it.   
  
The golden uni rolled her eyes, deciding that it must have been picked up by one of the other contestants who had used it and then realized it wasn't hers and left it here in an attempt to look innocent. Dirty ragamuffins... As bent over to pick up the polish, there was a loud slam and suddenly, she found herself in complete darkness. She blinked and then looked over her shoulder to find that the closet door had been shut behind her. Most people in Darling's position would have been frightened...yet she wasn't. In fact, she was enraged.  
  
She stormed to the closed door and pounded impatiently on it with both hooves. "OPEN THIS DOOR!!!" she demanded. "OPEN IT RIGHT NOW!!!" Faint voices from outside...they sounded like they were laughing. "YOU JEALOUS LITTLE CREEPS!!" she screeched. "YOU JUST DID THIS BECAUSE YOU KNEW I WAS GONNA BEAT YOU!!!!" There was a sound of retreating footsteps and then silence. "LET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!!!" she wailed, even though she knew it was pointless. Ohh...SOMEONE was going to pay for this, she fumed as she sat back on her haunches and glared fixatedly at the locked door.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"You think we took it too far?" Hubert asked as he and Dr. Death retreated into the hallway from the ladies' dressing room.   
  
"Feh. No." the techo fumed. "With a voice like that, chances are they'll find her before the contest is over anyway. Call *me* a loser...spoiled little brat." The thought that he might have just increased Rose's chances of winning was overshadowed by his own personal grudge with the uni in the closet.  
  
"I guess you're right." the mynci shrugged. "Just....wow, I wish Rose had told us she was competing. I mean, you and I will both vote for her, but I don't think she'll rake in much more than that..."  
  
"If she thought she was being cute springing this on everybody, then that's her problem." Dr. Death replied coldly.   
  
"Aww have a heart, doc." Hubert goaded. "She probably just decided to go at the last minute."  
  
"Doesn't matter." the techo grumped. "And I hope she at least has the decency to admit this was her fault if she loses instead of pointing fingers at everyone else like she usually does."  
  
"Well *I'M* gonna vote for her." Hubert replied with a shrug as they approached the doors to the auditorium again. From inside, faint traces of music could be heard and the crowd was silent, signifying that an act was currently going on. The mynci pushed the door open as quietly as he was able and winced as his ears were filled by the sound of a young red flotsam singing very loudly and out of tune to "Michael Finnigan". Had she been older, the crowd likely would have booed her straight off the stage, but given that she was little more than a baby, they were all grinning and bearing it. "Besides, if the competition in the uni category is anything like this, she'll have no problem." he whispered to the frost-haired techo as the two of them quietly returned to their seats.  
  
After a moment more, the red flotsam finished her act and was greeted with polite applause from the crowd as she bowed and scuttled to the back of the stage where the other finalists awaited and the announcer, a well-kept kyrii in a suit that could have been the host of Better Than You's brother strode out on the stage with an enormous grin.  
  
"Wasn't she wonderful, folks?" he asked the crowd. "Little Applejackz there was our final flotsam competitor. What I'd like to ask you good people to do now....well, you know the drill." he smiled, raising a small trickle of laughter from the audience. "But for those of you who've been asleep, I'd like you to take out the number pad found in the pouch of the seatback in front of you...for you folks in the front row, they're in a holder on the stagefront...and cast your vote for who you liked best!" there was a universal scuffling and rummaging as everyone reached for their numberpad and began to punch in the number of their favorite contestant.   
  
After a moment of bleeping and booping, silence fell over the auditorium once again and the kyrii waited patiently, watching the television monitor in front of the judge's booth for the results to be processed. A tense moment later, the screen blazed alight with the figures. "And the winner for the species category of Flotsam with 43% of the votes is contestant number eight, Glitterfishy!!"   
  
A yellow flotsam that had painted herself up in sparkle paint and sported a pair of colorfully-painted cardboard faerie wings on her back, squealed in delight and ran from her place in the line of hopeful contestants, throwing herself at the announcer and hugging him tightly as the crowd cheered.  
  
"What do you think? Was that one a guild-voted winner?" Hubert asked Dr. Death.  
  
"I dunno. That one at least looks like she put a little effort into her costume." Dr. Death shrugged. Better than last week's....it was just a blue flotsam that had put on a pair of step-out shoes and was ranked second overall.   
  
"Hmph..." Hubert grunted as the kyrii announced second and third place along with the honorable mentions. "Well that's what happens when it turns into a popularity contest, I guess." The flotsams began to file off of the stage.  
  
"Let's give all of them a big hand, everybody!" the announcer cried, making the crowd burst into peals of applause. "Up next, Neopia's favorite mystical equines, let's bring on our uni contestants!!" Cheers and whoops went up from various sections of the audience as the first of the colorful unicorn neopets began to walk onstage. Amid them was Rose, her shoulders slightly hunched and looking as though she was trying not to be noticed.   
  
"Looks like you could knock her over with a feather." Hubert remarked. Dr. Death nodded as he watched the contestants all line up along the back of the stage.   
  
"I'm wondering what she's going to do for her act." the techo said quietly. "She wasn't exactly practicing anything." He fell silent as the first contestant was called forward to perform. A young blue uni wearing a pastel frilly dress stepped forward as a stage attendant scurried onto the stage to lower the microphone for her. The equine looked shyly at the audience and began to recite a poem, presumably of her own, as everyone listened.   
  
The next act were a pair of young striped foal twins that had brought an electric keyboard with them and played a slightly dischordant duet of Heart And Soul, ending with the two of them fighting over who's turn it was to turn the music page and being gently ushered off the stage by an assistant, much to the audience's amusement.  
  
One by one the contestants performed, each getting their share of applause and approval. FluffyRabbit's tapdance routine, as luck would have it, went off perfectly and she didn't stumble once. And at last, it was Rose's turn. The red uni crept to the front of the stage, wringing her hooves nervously. She had decided, as she had sat and watched the other unis perform that she would recite a poem she had memorized from her school days....but as she drew near the microphone and stared out into the sea of faces of everyone watching her, the words slipped out of her mind.   
  
Rose opened her mouth in an attempt to speak, horrified by the thin ribbon of whisper that came out. She attempted again, trembling all over as the silence of the crowd sank in. There had never been a time she could remember when she had been this nervous and swore that her heart was threatening to come straight out of her ears if it pounded much harder. She took a deep breath, starting to feel dizzy.  
  
"Hello...I'm..." she managed before the world spun out of control and a veil of white settled over her vision. There was the faint sensation of falling, a thud...and then she slipped into blackness.   
  
A murmur of anxiety passed through the crowd as she laid still, showing no motion of getting up.   
  
"Geez! She fainted!" Hubert cried, jumping up and followed shortly by Dr. Death. Before the two of them could fight their way out of their row and up to the stage, however, two of the backstage attendants had already scurried forward and were in the process of hovering over Rose. After a moment one of them,a red techo, picked up the microphone.  
  
"Ahhh folks, I'd like to ask if ya'd just calm down and stay in your seats. It looks like just a little heat exhaustion up here....she's alright." the techo attendant said, averting his eyes from the crowd. Apparently he wasn't too keen on being up in front of everybody either as he briskly replaced the mike and talked to the other attendant. After some fumbling, the two of them picked the red uni's inert form up and carried her clumsily off of the stage.   
  
Finally free of their seating row, Dr. Death and Hubert hurried out of the auditorium and made a B-line for the backstage entrance.   
  
"Thought you said you didn't care about her..." Hubert said as they ran.   
  
"Never said that....and this isn't exactly romantic circumstances.....now is it, you moron??" the techo panted in reply as they both paused for a moment to catch their breath before shoving open the door and stumbling inside. Another act was going on to playcate the audience while a small circle of people were huddled around Rose.   
  
"What happened?"  
  
"Don't know, she just keeled over."  
  
"She okay?"  
  
"Poor dear..."   
  
These and numerous other sentiments were exchanged among the throng of onlookers as the mynci and techo muscled their way into the circle. The two attendants who had rescued Rose from the stage were both kneeling over her.   
  
"She'll be alright." one remarked, peeling back one of her eyelids to shine a flashlight in her eye. "Her pupils aren't even dilated. It was just a panic attack." As though on cue, the uni groaned and began to stir.   
  
"Wha....?" she asked wearily. "Did I oversleep again...?" she asked.   
  
"You just fainted, Miss." one of the attendants told her gently, helping her sit up. She winced, her hoof going to the base of her skull where she had hit it on the stage floor. "Randy, go get her some water." he barked at the red techo that had been on the microphone a few moments ago.   
  
"Rose, are you alright?" Dr. Death asked, ducking between two people and kneeling beside her.   
  
"Doc...?" she asked. "You....you didn't send in those forms, did you?" she asked. He winced, realizing she wasn't quite all there yet.  
  
"Rose, you passed out on stage. Do you remember that?" he asked tentatively.   
  
"Wuzzah stage?" she asked, blinking slowly and still rubbing at the back of her head...and suddenly things began to trickle back for her. The anxiety of not having an act, hastily deciding she was going to recite a poem, walking up to the microphone...and then waking up in the darkness of the backstage area with nearly a dozen faces looming over her. "Mmnnhh...I really fainted?" she asked, looking at him doubtfully.  
  
"Looks like you cracked your head a good one on the floor too." Hubert chimed in, shoving in beside Dr. Death. "You really alright?"  
  
"I....I guess so..." she murmured, wincing as the tip of her hoof touched the forming bruise at the top of her neck. "Is the contest over?"  
  
"You've only been out for about two minutes, miss." one of the attendants told her. "But just relax. You're going to be alright." Rose hesitated as though thinking some more, and then moved to stand, wincing as another wave of dizzyness hit her.  
  
"No, no, lay down." Dr. Death told her quickly, attempting to push her back into a reclined position. She groaned and swatted his hands away.  
  
"Leeme 'lone." she drawled, closing her eyes for a moment and opening them, willing everything to come back into focus. "I'm alright..." She pulled herself to her knees and then stood, tottering a bit. Four sets of hands instantly shot out to steady her, but dropped away as they found that it was unnecessary. She paused a moment, breathing deeply, before looking over her shoulder at them. "I'm going to try again." she said hoarsely.  
  
"Rose, don't." Dr. Death told her. "Look, you've got nothing to prove to me, okay? You showed up, I'm not going to dog you about passing out and---"  
  
"I'm not doing it for you." Rose spat with a ferocity that startled him. Saying so, she brushed past him and shook her head once in a vain attempt to straighten her mane a bit before striding back out onto the stage just as the applause for the last act's completion began to swell.   
  
"Headstrong." Hubert remarked with a smirk, putting a hand on Dr. Death's shoulder. "Gotta give her props for that, huh?"  
  
"When I want your opinion, I'll rattle the bars of your cage." the techo said snidely, pushing the mynci's hand off of his shoulder, his eyes never leaving the stage as Rose approached the microphone again and the applause died away to a confused murmur. She waited for silence, the same feeling of insecurity flaring in her as before...but this time, it was tempered and she managed to keep it in check.  
  
"I'm not going to lie to you people..." she began, wincing as her voice reverberated loudly back at her and the microphone whined with feedback. "I've....I've wanted to be up here since I was a little girl. Never really got the chance, given where I work. I doubt I've gotten a very good reputation." She paused, her sapphire eyes scanning the audience. Someone coughed off in the distance. "But just because my coworker can be a jerk doesn't mean I should have to sit and stand for it, right?" This remark was met with a small scattering of agreeing applause. "I think he's lorded over what I do and don't for long enough, so now I'm going to get to the point and recite a poem that I learned in---"  
  
"Now you wait just a minute!" Dr. Death called. Rose whipped her head in the direction of the backstage as the yellow techo stormed onto the stage, apparently heedless of the crowd as Hubert desperately beckoned for him to come back for the moment before sighing and withdrawing backstage again. The audience gave mingled gasps and mutters of confusion as the techo doctor confronted the uni. "Don't you go pinning this on me!"  
  
"Do we have to get into this now??" Rose hissed. "I'm in front of all the people!"  
  
"I don't care!" he snapped. "You think you're high and mighty because you fit pets with new owners and I always have to be the bad guy, Rose??"  
  
"No..." she sighed, glaring at him. She was determined that he was not going to get her goat...not in front of half of Neopia. A smug smile crossed her face. "I think I'm better than you because I don't have the distinct honor of being at the top of the Faerie Queen's poo list." He blinked as though he had just been slapped and the audience exploded in chuckles.   
  
"Cute....very cute, Rose...." he snarled. "You want to get into embarrassing topics? Fine. Let's talk Fourth Of July." Rose's eyes flew wide.   
  
"You wouldn't dare..." she gasped.   
  
"You remember that, don't you? Someone thought it would be funny to slip a tin of Flat-U-Less tablets in the punch and you drank an entire tumbler? It sure wasn't the FIREWORKS people were paying attention to, now was it??" Those in the audience who had managed to keep themselves under control and not laugh last time, exploded in hysterics.   
  
"You...!!!" she cried, flushing hotly with embarrassment. "Chomby Day, pal!!" she growled. Dr. Death's eyes widened, knowing which card she was about to pull as the audience's laughter died a bit so they could hear.   
  
"Rose..." he said warningly. The uni donned a mocking voice.  
  
"Well how was *I* supposed to know her boyfriend was a Grarrl? You'd think he'd be HAPPY to know his girlfriend's scales looked nice! Did he knock out any teeth, Rose?" she asked in an apparant imitation of something the doctor had said. With the last plug pulled, the two proceeded to argue. It wasn't often that Rose and Dr. Death got into spats with one another, but when something finally sparked one, they were merciless and intense.   
  
Insults flew like wildfire between the two as the crowd roared with laughter. Just as it seemed the confrontation was about to come to physical blows, the announcer, wiping tears of laughter away from the corners of his eyes, stumbled out onstage between the two of them and gave them each a congratulatory handshake, ignoring the vehement looks they were still favoring one another with.   
  
"How about that, folks?" he asked, snatching up the microphone, still snorting and hitching. "And here we thought she didn't have an act....hoo...thank you, Rose. Brilliant. Just simply brilliant getting your coworker in on this."   
  
"But that wasn't my act, I was just---" she tried to explain, horrified.   
  
"I know that's a hard act to follow, but next up we have OpalHorn." he interrupted, giving her a gentle shove to let her know it was time to leave. The uni bit her lip, suddenly humiliated beyond belief. It had seemed that her sudden burst of courage meant nothing. She had publically embarrassed herself anyway by taking the bait and allowing Dr. Death to draw her into a knock-down drag-out verbal fight. Now instead of people remembering her fainting which, at least, she hadn't been able to control, they were going to be talking about her screeching and making a fool of herself.   
  
Tears spilling down her cheeks, she choked back a sob and walked briskly from the stage. Dr. Death followed closely behind her, suddenly quite self-conscience of the fact that he was being watched by hundreds of eyes. Safely behind the curtains, she allowed herself to break down and begin to cry.   
  
"Was that really necessary, you two??" Hubert demanded to know, glaring at the both of them. "I've seen hyperactive Jubjubs act more maturely than that!!"  
  
"She started it." Dr. Death shrugged, jerking a thumb at Rose.   
  
"Enough!! Leave me alone!!" she wailed. "All you do is try to make me miserable! I'm tired of it!!" Dr. Death opened his mouth to defend himself and found that he had nothing to say as she turned and fled the auditorium.   
  
"You really need to learn when you've taken it far enough, doc." Hubert sighed, deciding to follow Rose's example and leave the auditorium as well. The techo stood alone, blinking and fathoming what had just happened. Taken it far enough? Why hadn't she just told him he had crossed the line? Why did it take outbursts like this to get her to tell him *anything*, for that matter?  
  
Story of his life, he thought bitterly, finally leaving the auditorium as well, not in pursuit of anyone in particular and not quite sure what he planned on doing with the rest of his evening.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
  
Rose awoke with a headache the next morning, having cried herself to sleep the night before. She was still wearing her dress, she noted, which no longer looked vibrant and glossy, but was now rumpled and tired-looking. Where she had hit her head the night before had blossomed into a dull painful throb that made her eyes feel like they were being pushed out of the front of her head.   
  
She groaned and sat up, already wondering if she should call in sick. No...probably a bad idea. She had already taken enough time off to prepare for this enormous disappointment....and she would have to face the public sooner or later, after all. She pulled the dress off over her head and tossed it aside, not worrying about putting it back on its hanger as she shuffled into her washroom and drew herself a hot bath.   
  
After what seemed like hours, she emerged, dried and devoid of the makeup she had put on the night before. She had decided that she was going to ignore everybody...and if they wanted to make fun of her about something as stupid as the contest, that was their business but she was washing her hooves of it from here on out.   
  
Rose paused in front of her mirror long enough to comb the tangles out of her mane before leaving for work. She kept her head down as she walked, inwardly cringing every time she thought someone was looking at her. Ignoring them, she realized, wasn't going to work if she was going to be this sensitive about being confronted. As luck would have it, she managed to make it to the pound more or less unnoticed and ducked inside the building gratefully. Dr. Death looked up from where he was finishing a cup of coffee and half-heartedly reading the paper.   
  
"Oh you DID show up." he remarked.   
  
"Just shut up." she told him coldly as she crossed the room and took her seat at the desk. "I don't want to hear anything about last night. Not a word."   
  
"I guess you're not interested in this then." he told her. There was a soft metallic thump beside her and she shifted her eyes to see a glint of bronze. She gasped and sat up, looking in dismay down at the third place trophy.   
  
"What...?" she asked, confused.   
  
"Apparently the audience thought our tiff was an act." he told her. "You got beaten out by the tapdancer and the striped twins, but they voted you into third for species. Not too bad for your first contest." Rose, still in awe, held the bronze trophy up, looking at her name engraved on its side with the current date. "You ran off before they could give it to you so I said I'd keep it for you."   
  
"I don't know what to say..." she said in a tiny and drained voice.   
  
"And next time I'm shoving you over the edge, let me know will you?" he asked her. "You looked like a complete featherhead running off last night." Rose's ears drooped in shame.  
  
"I'm sorry...I just....I guess I was just overwhelmed." she faltered. "And I just--"  
  
"No I'm sorry." he interrupted. "Hubert was right, I need to learn when its time to stop. I didn't mean to send you off screaming into the night like that."   
  
"You're....apologizing?" she asked, cocking a brow. "Do wonders ever cease today?"  
  
"Don't push it." he grumbled, clearing his throat. "But there...you got what you wanted. Can the world go back to spinning now?"  
  
"Ohh...I don't know. Maybe I'll compete next week." she grinned. "Try for second place, you know?" She cast a sly sidelong glance at the doctor, noticing that the corner of his mouth had picked up a peculiar twitch. The uni smirked and began the day's paperwork. She had only been kidding and she would be sure to tell Dr. Death that. Someday.  
  
  
THE END 


End file.
